I was up for my normal walk/run/drag/sludge/limp/ ”someone carry me please” this morning and I was just fussing away. I woke up at 4 am, which is early for me. I am not sure if this is me thing, and I can’t say it is a good thing, but I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I had to terminate one of my employees today and that wasn’t a good start of the day.
The birds were tweeting and singing as I walked. Clearly they had no idea that ‘thunder’ was walking underneath them. I started fussing at any and everyone that I felt had stepped out of line with me or someone who had done something I didn’t like. If I felt like something unfair had occurred, it was my place to straighten out this crooked path.
This went on for a hour and it jumped from one person to another for the whole time. I am actually embarrassed to admit this and that it went on at all let alone how long I ranted. Some would call it ‘therapeutic’ while I am sure there are others that would call it ‘wrong’ or ‘sin’ or something like that. “You have a bad attitude Mr. Kennon” Just call me ‘B.A Baracus’….
As for me, I am not sure since I now spend a lot of my days questioning anything and everything. But what I will say is ‘it didn’t leave me feeling very good about things’ and that my friends is very telling.
So, I started to pray. “Lord what is wrong with me, I have a good life, really, I do, You’ve blessed me with so so much. Why does it seem there is so much bitterness or anger floating around in me like flotsam left over from a sunken ship?”
Wait for it…wait for it….
Nothing…
Nothing at all. The only thing I could hear was my labored breathing like a dying Brontosaurus trying to pole jump…(not happening by the way) 🙂
So I reached up and pulled down a leaf from a tree I was passing under. It was actually a seed pod. I could feel the 3 or 4 seeds under the the green texture as I rubbed my hand over the pod. I have no idea ‘why’ I did the next thing but, I folded the seed pod over on itself so I could break it open, lifted it to my nose and took in a huge, green, head filling gulp of fresh summer smell.
I was transported back to living in a tree. Yes, you read this correctly, I used to live in a tree. Well, let’s just say, the amount of hours I spent in trees when I was a child would be put on the scales at hours, lots of hours. I think for my mom it must have been something like having 3 chimps living in the back yard swinging from tree to tree, squealing, falling, jumping, and building through the summers. (Planet of the Ape’s really did happen) 🙂
My brothers and I boasted of the only 3 story tree house in the neighborhood. (A story probably equated to about 4 feet high at best. We took small pieces of wood and drove one or two nails into into the wide flat sides to the side of the tree to make a sorta of ladder. (We learned the hard way that if you only put one, the step will spin and you…will…fall. 🙂
I believe we also used a hanging rope from time to time, which also served as a great elevator! One summer, we found a old carpet that was a good 15 feet by 15 feet. We put up support beams from 3 trees that had grown in a triangle. We nailed the carpet to the beams and basically had the worlds largest plush hammack about 10 feet off the ground.
(Note to those reading…carpet is not meant to get wet and after a few weeks outside with rain, dry, rain and then dry, it weakened.) In one of our more ‘brilliant moves’ we decided to jump off the 3rd story of the Kennon ‘de-ranch’ hacienda’ into said big hammack,carpet ‘thing’.
The weight of a 10 year will go straight through worn carpet like air passing escaping from a balloon….’swoosh’ and you’re out on the ground. Not a good plan and especially when there was a rusted barbed wire fence underneath. Oh well, not my kid, no worries…:-)
All of these thoughts came back in a split second of smell. I had to wonder, as I made my way back to the apartment, if my prayer wasn’t answered in someway.
Seeds pods and living in a tree are much better things to think about. Maybe the thoughts of the almighty could be summed up into ‘think about something else Jeff, it would do you soul good….”
Maybe a slight version of Phil 4:8
Safe journeys this week.
